Sex and sexuality week: Kody shares his story of growing up gay in country Victoria
Trinity resident Kody Roth grew up in regional Victoria, where he struggled with his sexual identity throughout his school years. It wasn’t until he moved to Melbourne and Trinity College that he finally felt comfortable to embrace his sexuality.
From as early as year 8, Kody Roth recalls his peers questioning his sexuality – before he himself had even considered his sexual preferences. His classmates would attempt to label his sexuality through questions like ‘you’re gay, right?’.
Kody felt increasing angst around this possibility, as being gay was ‘not the correct way to be’ within his school environment. A student at his school started expressing themself in drag and was heavily ridiculed for this, which left Kody feeling frightened and unsupported about his sexuality. ‘I do not think there was a single ‘out’ kid at my school,’ says Kody.
‘I do not think there was a single ‘out’ kid at my school.'
During the COVID-19 pandemic, Kody moved from Hamilton in regional Victoria to Melbourne to live with his aunty for four months, before returning to Hamilton to commence his final years of high school. Of the experience he says ‘it gave me more time to think about myself, get in my own headspace and consider the possibility of being gay.’
By year 11, Kody felt more confident in himself, but was still not openly ‘out’, with many questions still surfacing … like, am I actually gay? Though the masculine, ‘jock’ boys at his school made Kody’s sexuality an ongoing topic of uncomfortable conversation, towards the end of year 12, Kody began to embrace his sexuality – realising that he was in fact gay – and even produced a self-portrait that reflected the isolation he experienced growing up as part of his studio arts subject (pictured below).
Self portrait by Kody Roth
Self portrait by Kody Roth
In 2023, Kody moved back to Melbourne, this time by himself, with the mindset of being in a ‘new city’ with ‘new opportunities’. He was yearning for a change of scenery, different to that of a small rural town, and decided that Melbourne was for him.
Kody had visited Trinity College’s open day in 2022 and recalls the moment he met a student who was also gay. This student appeared extremely confident in himself and at home at Trinity, giving Kody faith that Trinity and Melbourne could be somewhere he called home. The positive culture that he experienced through visiting Trinity College felt so much different – so much more comfortable – than that of the communities he’d encountered in the past.
‘At college, being gay did not seem like a big deal at all, whereas at home, it was quite a big deal.’
Once Kody settled into college life at Trinity, he could turn his attention to his studies and other passions, such as the performing arts. ‘At college, being gay does not seem like a big deal at all, whereas at home, it was quite a big deal,’ he says.
Kody living it up at Trinity College
Kody living it up at Trinity College
What is sex and sexuality week?
Trinity College’s Sex and Sexuality Week is taking place from 3–9 April 2023. This important week in the social calendar aims to encourage enriching discussion surrounding sexual health and promote awareness. It also serves to demonstrate support for students’ diverse and evolving sexualities and identities.
At Trinity, the safety and support of students is paramount, and this week aims to facilitate and foster the college’s values throughout the entire community.
During this week and throughout the year, Trinity’s Gender and Sexuality Alliance (GSA) works to continue to prioritise sexual awareness through initiatives and events. One of the ways to encourage positive discussion surrounding sex and sexuality is by sharing stories and getting to know those in our community, like Kody. By doing this, the college community can become increasingly supportive and knowledgeable of the challenges students may face around their sexuality and associated experiences.
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